


Don't cry, it'll be alright

by orphan_account



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Birthday, Car Accidents, Heavy Angst, Hospitalization, Hospitals, Hurt Tony Stark, M/M, Sad Ending, Shock, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-22 08:27:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17056325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Sometimes, birthdays aren't always the best days of the year, and Tony Stark is about to find out why.





	1. Revelation

_Where the fuck is that guy?! He was supposed to be here 30 minutes ago!_ Bucky thought, flustered and stressed out.

Pulling his phone out from his blue designer jeans, he dialled a number and impatiently waited for the other person to pick up as he paced around the kitchen of the Compound.

For what seemed like hours, the line finally connected, and Bucky didn't hesitate to immediately start screaming into his phone.

"Steve! Where the actual  _fuck_ are you?! It's literally 5:35 PM, you were supposed to be here  _half an hour_ ago! How are we supposed to start preparing and setting things up if you're going to arrive 5 minutes before the party?! Rhodey can't keep him pre-occupied for much longer and the rest of us are waiting for your fucking instructions!"

Shortly after, Steve answered from the other side, clearly also stressed out if his tone was anything to go by.

"I know,  _I know_ , I'm sorry. There's just so much traffic, I really should have just had my present delivered to the Compound. You guys still have about an hour and a half left before he'll come back, just set the place up the way we discussed, there's a rough sketch of what things should go where in my room, use that as a guideline... Do you guys at least have the cake?"

Running into the house to grab Steve's sketch, Bucky rummaged through his and Steve's room until he found what Steve was talking about. "Yes, we do. Wait, according to your sketch, you want the cake to be put on the coffee table on top of your shield?"

"Yes, just do as the sketch says, call me if you need help with anything else, I'm gonna have to end the call, driving right now and traffic is finally clearing up, hopefully, I'll arrive in 30 minutes. Oh, also, call me if Rhodey says that he can stall for no longer and that they're coming home." Steve spoke through the call urgently.

Bucky instructed the Avengers that were at the house to start setting things up according to the sketch, they'd hopefully be done in about 45 minutes, 30 if they were really fast. "Sure. And Steve, try and arrive earlier, you're his husband, it'd devastate him if you didn't show up to his birthday."

"I know, I'll try my best. But if I don't manage to arrive on time, at least tell him that I say happy birthday and that I love him. Also be sure to mention I planned this entire thing, I need _that_ recognition at least. Or even better, put me on a call so I can talk to him directly." Steve added as he finally cleared onto relatively light traffic.

"Sure will. But hey, you don't need to feel pressured to arrive if you physically can't, Tony loves you and you missing his birthday party won't change that, pretty dick move though, not gonna lie." Bucky spoke into the phone as he smirked while opening a box filled with confetti.

"Yeah, whatever, sap... Oh, and Bucky? Thanks."

"No problem man." At that moment, a sound that sounded suspiciously like metal poles falling to the ground came from the gym. "Well I gotta go now, seems like Wanda and Sam are fucking up the tent thing. Hopefully, we'll see you later."

"Yeah, bye." And with that Steve ended the call.

Groaning loudly, Steve hit his head against his headrest multiple times, quite literally fed up with his own bullshit.  _Ugh, what the actual fuck are you doing? With the speed you're going at now, you'll most definitely miss Tony's birthday party. And missing your husband's birthday? What kind of husband are you? Like Bucky said, "pretty dick move". God, even Bucky thinks I'm a dick._

Steve's guilt was immeasurable, Tony never once missed one of his birthdays ever since they met, in fact, he planned and paid for all of the parties held on his birthday, Tony was the best husband he could ever have asked for. He, on the other hand, well, he's about to miss this one  _and_  he nearly missed Tony's birthday 2 years ago, pretty shitty husband if you asked literally anyone.

 _Hopefully,_ _they manage to get everything prepared before Tony comes home._ Steve hoped.  _Well, I'll drive a bit over the speed limit, going a bit faster won't kill anyone, and I'm not about to miss this birthday, not over my dead body._

Oh, the irony...

* * *

_45 minutes later..._

"Hey, guys! Rhodey just texted me telling us that he and Tony are on their way home, they'll be here in 10 minutes!" Bucky yelled in the direction of the kitchen, they were practically done with setting up and were now only waiting on Steve, who was yet to arrive.

"Where's Steve?" Natasha asked. "He should be here by now."

"Don't know, lemme call him and find out, this douchebag should've arrived nearly an hour ago."

Dialling his number, Bucky waited as he did 45 minutes ago, but this time, no one picked up the call. He tried again, still no answer. He tried a third time, still, no answer from the other side.

 _Okay,_ _what the fuck? Why isn't Steve picking up?! Don't fucking tell me his phone is out of battery, I swear Steve is so fucking dead after this. He may have planned all of this but he's not even fucking here and Tony is going to arrive in like 5 minutes. Guess we'll just have to start without him._ Bucky thought, angry at the fact Steve was still absent.

"Guys! Steve probably won't be arrived any time soon, he isn't picking up his phone, I think it's dead. He's probably stuck in traffic somewhere. We'll have to get this show on the road without him."

"What the fuck? Steve isn't coming? He's Tony's husband, why the fuck isn't he coming?!" Sam asked, clearly pretty flustered and mad.

"I know, we're all mad, but Tony's gonna be here in like 5 minutes, we need to start turning lights off before he gets here." Bucky's phone pinged, alerting him of a notification, opening it, he hoped he'd see a text saying that Steve had arrived, but what he got instead was much worse. "Shit! Tony's here! Everyone, positions! Lights!"

A few moments later, the Compound darkened and silence filled the space. Only to be broken by the sound of footsteps echoing through the corridor that leads to the entrance.

As the door to the kitchen opened, Tony's confused voice was heard. "Why is it so dark? It's 6:25 PM. Rhodey?"

"Just go in man, who cares." Rhodey replied, trying to act nonchalant. Luckily for him, it seemed to work as Tony entered the house, though hesitantly. He then flipped the light switches only to have nothing happen.

"What the hell? Why aren't these switches working?"

"Maybe try the ones near the dining tables, we never really used the switches near the entrance, so they might've not worked long before this."

Tony hesitantly complied, walking across the dark living room towards the switches he knew were next to the dining tables. But before he could flip them, however, a hand grabbed his and he promptly screamed and practically jumped back and landed on one of the dining chairs, he was never one for jump scares.

The lights turned on and the room filled with confetti. An Iron Man coloured banner was hung above the kitchen entrance that read: Happy Birthday Tony. With various other decorations put up around the room.

Then all the Avengers sprung out of hiding (all from varying locations, some of which were just baffling) and simultaneously yelled. "Happy birthday!"

Tony, who was still breathing hard from the jump scare, laughed and couldn't help the smile that broke out on his face. It turns out it was Sam that grabbed Tony's hand, and Tony was not slow to address that. "So it was  _you_! Sam! Fuck you! You nearly gave me a fucking heart attack."

Everyone laughed at that, with Bucky speaking up. "Yeah, wouldn't want the birthday boy to die on his birthday now would we?"

Rhodey, who just now noticed what was on the coffee table, laughed and said. "Hey! Look behind you!"

"Wow, is that actually Steve’s shield or just another one of those fakes you got from the store? Because Steve never lets anyone touch his shield! ... Wait, no fucking way, it's a vanilla cake with strawberry filling?!" Tony exclaimed excitedly.

"Yeah it is, Steve did say it was your favourite." Bruce answered.

Tony smiled at that, Steve really came through, he couldn't have asked for someone better than Steve to be his husband, the only thing he regretted though was meeting him so late in his life.

"Well, Steve did plan this entire thing." Bucky added.

Tony, who just now noticed the relative lack of Steve's calm and soothing presence, searched the room for Steve. Though he couldn't find him. He frowned. "Speaking of Steve, where is he?"

Before anyone could answer, however, the sound of Bucky's phone going off filled the living room, his eyes widened as he looked down at the screen and excused himself from the room. Unaware of the pairs of eyes boring into his retreating back, as he was already answering the call.

Tony, who was still frowning, questioned curiously. "Guys? Where's Steve?"

"Steve said he might be late to the party, he told us we should continue without him." Sam spoke up.

Before Tony could say anything, however, the sound of a phone dropping to the floor echoed from the corridor.

"Bucky? Is everything alright?" Tony asked curiously as he stood up and walked towards the kitchen entrance.

Bucky was standing in the middle of the hallway, completely still with his side to Tony, with one of his hands still cupped around his ear, but instead of him holding a phone to his ear, his phone was on the floor next to him. The screen was shattered but was still functioning as the call screen was still visible.

"Bucky? You okay? Who are you calling?" Tony prodded again having not received an answer the first time.

Upon closer inspection, Bucky's mouth was slightly ajar and his eyes were unfocused, not only that, but the hand next to his ear was shaking as well. As if he were in... shock.

Tony opened his mouth to question Bucky again, but something on Bucky's phone screen caught his attention before he could form any words.

Taking a few steps closer, Tony managed to make out the name "Steve" on the caller ID and his heart skipped a beat, out of joy or shock though, he wouldn't know.

Tony stared at the phone for a second longer until he glanced back to Bucky, who was now being pulled over to the couch by Natasha and Sam, who both wore worried expressions at Bucky's strange behaviour.

_What happened during that phone call?_

Looking back down at the forgotten phone on the floor, Tony noticed that Steve hadn't hung up yet. Looking back over to where Bucky and the rest of the Avengers were, it seemed they were all enamoured with trying to get Bucky to talk, it didn't seem like success was on the horizon, however. Pulling his vision back to the phone, Tony quickly decided that if he couldn't get answers out of Bucky, he'd get them out of his husband. He needed to know what was happening, why Bucky was acting so strange and most importantly, he wanted to know where Steve was.

Resolutely, Tony grabbed the phone and slid out of the Compound undetected, surprisingly. Walking across the living room until he was far enough away from the kitchen so that no one could hear him speak, he put the phone to his ear and waited a beat until he said softly, with worry lacing his voice.

"Steve?"

There was no reply, only the sounds of shuffling and the faint sound of some sort of siren.

"Hello? Steve? Are you there?"

This time a voice did answer, but it was distinctly female, and not Steve's.

"Sir? You're back, we thought we lost you for a second there. I know what I told you just now may have been a shock but—" The voice answered before being cut off by Tony, who was extremely confused as to why the voice answering him was not Steve's.

_Why does a woman have Steve's phone? What is happening?!_

"Wait, you're not Steve. Who are you and why do you have Steve's phone? Where is Steve Rogers? I need to speak to him."

There was no immediate reply, only the faint sounds of mumbling in the background on the other side, as if a conversation was being had.

 _Am I being pranked? Is this just another one of Bucky's elaborate pranks?_ Tony thought. He decided to check to see if his hunch was true, before he could though, the female voice spoke again.

"Sir, you're speaking to emergency services here. I regret to inform you that Mr Rogers is currently unavailable at the moment..." A sigh and a long deep breath were heard from the other side, as if she were preparing for something, something bad.

"Sir, your companion was involved in a car accident.”


	2. Disbelief

Tony was speechless.

His breath all but caught in his throat, suddenly removing the ability for him to form coherent words.

Not only that, his mind was blank, the only thought going through his mind was disbelief, funnily enough. You'd think that upon hearing such news, your mind would be racing with thoughts of shock, denial and grief. This, however, wasn't the case for Tony Stark.

It wasn't that Tony didn't love Steve enough for him to grieve over Steve, if anything, the opposite was true, Tony loved Steve, so much so it hurt to hear, let alone  _believe_ , something bad happened to him, especially something as deadly as a car accident.

So, Tony's first reaction to the news was disbelief, and nothing else. Not because he didn't love Steve enough to feel any other feelings, but because he loved him far too much for him to be able  _to_ feel any other feelings and remain sane and somewhat composed.

He needed to remain composed, Tony knew it would do no one any good if he broke down right then and there, no matter how much he wanted, and oh did he want to. He was already fighting a losing battle against his emotions not even a minute after hearing the news.

His eyes prickled with unshed tears, though he refused to let them fall, letting the fall would symbolise him accepting this news as the truth, and he refused to believe so,  _he couldn't believe so_.

His mouth seemed to move of its own accord, Tony's conscience couldn't hear what he was saying, nor could it hear what the lady on the other line was saying either. But his mind did, and it took action immediately.

It didn’t take him more than second to determine that he wouldn’t be able to fly in the suit in his current state of mind, even with JARVIS piloting, being airborne did not feel like something that would go well.

So Tony bolted to the garage doors and quickly opened them. Yet again, Tony's mind was ahead of his conscience, seeing as it wasn't until now that he realised, he had picked up his car keys from the reception table in front of the entrance. Not wanting to waste time dwelling on the abnormality of him not realising nor remembering doing certain tasks, he bolted to his car and practically jumped into the driver's seat.

He quickly turned the engine on and sat there staring out onto the road ahead of him. Tears stung his eyes yet again, but he wiped them away just as fast as they appeared, he stubbornly refused to believe this until he saw it himself, and if he does, then, and only then will he break down. Then, and only then, will he allow himself to grieve, and if he does see it as the truth, oh he'll grieve.

Tony pushed hard on the accelerator and his car sped forward, he only had one destination in his mind, though he hated the fact that this was going to be his destination, but this was the only clue and piece of evidence he had on Steve's whereabouts, so he'd go there, no matter how much he hated to.

_What about the serum?! Isn’t that helping?! ... Steve’s being hospitalised, he must’ve lost too much blood for the serum to take effect!_

The drive was about one of the worst experiences of Tony's life, not only did he not stop periodically starting to tear up, his mind began logically assessing the situation, with it coming to the same conclusion every single time, a conclusion his conscience stubbornly refused to accept. Though he knew it would only be a matter of time before stubbornness cracked down to logic and reason, and he hated it.

His car felt suffocating, he knew it was all in his mind, but that didn't stop him from bolting out of it as fast as he could once he had arrived at his, no,  _the_ destination.

He bounded up to reception and leaned over the counter, completely ignoring the queue and the shouts and curses from those in the queue, he had no time to deal with trivial matters like that, his conscience needed to know the truth before his mind presented him with it.

Completely forgetting formalities, like he ever bothered with those in the first place, Tony urged. "Do you know where St—" His voice cracked, and tears began forming yet again.  _Dammit! Stop crying!_ "Where Steve Rogers is?"

He didn't know what he looked like at the moment, but he could only guess that he looked completely horrible with red glistening eyes and dishevelled hair, if the receptionist's reaction to his question was anything to go by.

Impatient as he was, he urged again, but now more forcefully, he couldn't wait any longer. "Do you?! I need to see  _now_! I need to know if he's okay."

"Sir, I'm sorry but—" The receptionist began, but she was quickly interrupted, Tony didn't want to hear this bullshit. He  _needed_ to see Steve, and if that was the last thing he'd do, then so be it. If what his mind was saying were true, it'd be better that way.

" _Please._ " Raw desperation was all that could be heard from Tony's voice, usually, that would be embarrassing, him begging in public, that’d surely make headlines, but he could care less what the media would think.

"Okay, Mr Rogers is currently in emergency room 2, but—"

Tony was already running off to where the directions on the ceiling said the emergency rooms were before the receptionist could finish, but he couldn't shake the unmistakable look of sympathy he saw in her eyes. His conscience chose to ignore it, his mind did not.

Usually, he was a rather eccentric person, tending to latch onto the smallest of details of virtually anything or anyone and extrapolate them so he could poke holes into them, it’s what he liked to do, find the flaws in everything, but he didn't have time for any of that nonsense right now, all he had on his conscience was getting to emergency room 2, and nothing would stop him from getting there, not the flaws in the design of the building nor the countless flaws in the technology used in this hospital and certainly not his mind constantly telling him the logical explanation he didn't want to hear.

A doctor was stationed in front of the emergency room door, presumably to stop him from seeing Steve, but before he could start pushing him forcibly out of the way, the doctor spoke up calmly, his eyes also filled with sympathy.

"Hello sir, I'm going to assume you're one of Mr Rogers' companions, so I'm not going to prevent you from visiting him, but the reason I'm here is to say that... we tried our best, and I'm so sorry."

The doctor stood there with his clipboard in hand and politely stepped out of the way, so the door was unobstructed. But Tony only stared at the handle.

He didn't know what to make of the doctor's statement, his mind had already discovered the truth, this only reinforced that, didn't make it any easier to deal with, but it did reinforce it nonetheless, his conscience, however, its walls of stubbornness were crumbling, more from this one statement than it did the entire time his mind attacked it with logic and reason. His mind, despite having reached the logical conclusion, was yet to come to terms with it, and it'd be a long time before it did. His conscience, despite showing signs of resignation, still held on to its disbelief, enough so that Tony grabbed a hold of the handle and twisted it. The door opened, and the sounds of mechanical beeps resounded from the room.

A cold shiver ran down his spine and his heartbeat quickened even more.

A step, another step, and another and he was in the room. The door shut behind him, presumably shut by the doctor, but he paid it no mind. His eyes were fixed on the unconscious figure lying on the medical bed in front of him, unforgiving wires connected the body to machines surrounding the bed and it was then that his conscience finally broke.

It was true.

Tears of grief quickly streamed down his face and sobs forced their way out from his mouth, his attempts at silencing them were futile. It was then that he noticed there was a stall placed next to the bed, which he was grateful for. Tony wasn't sure how long he could keep standing until his legs broke out on him.

Walking over to the bed, Tony grabbed hold of Steve's hand, interlocking them, Steve's hands were colder than usual, but there was still warmth, the warmth that he relished in, something he wasn't able to do today until now.

Sitting down on the stall, Tony let his head drop down onto Steve's body, despite still sensing a heartbeat, he still sobbed, though now it worsened. His sobs got louder, and his tears were wetting the medical robe Steve was wearing.

There was still the chance that Steve would be able to make it through this, he still had a heartbeat, after all, though his mind wasn't fooled, but that was all it took for his conscience to grab onto that particular fantasy.

"Steve." His voice was disrupted by sobs, and he didn't sound like Tony Stark, he sounded like a heartbroken man who was losing their husband that he loved so much. "Steve, I know you're probably unconscious right now, but I need to get this out." A sob. "When we met, I wasn't entirely sure if I was going to like you, in fact, I didn’t, you were just so different from anyone else, so I was reclusive and aggressive when it came to you." Another sob, Tony was exhausted, he wasn't sure how much longer he could do this for. "Turns out that was one of the worst mistakes of my life, your difference was what made you special, was what made you so friendly and lovely and in the end, it was what drove me to you." Tony was getting more tired every second, the toll of the evening finally catching up to him, he wasn't even sure what he was saying anymore, but he continued nonetheless. "I guess what I'm trying to say is, I... I love you, Steve, so much. I know we’re married and all and us loving each other is pretty obvious, but I just need to say this aloud, I love you so much it hurts, I know that sounds cliché but it's the truth. I know I say I hate your old sense of fashion and style, but secretly, I love it, and I think you know I love it too. And so, I hope you know that... I love you."

Then exhaustion overtook him. Tears still very visible on his flushed cheeks.

Steve, who was in fact slightly conscious throughout all of that, finally mustered the needed strength to speak and move his arms. He knew he wouldn't be able to make it, the doctor told him that much, even with the serum, he wouldn’t, he’s lost too much blood for it to be of any help, they could only extend the time he had left by a small bit, but that was all he needed.

Steve moved one of his arms with great effort, grunting due to the amount of energy he used to merely move his arm. Steve did his best to wipe away his husband's tears, he hated whenever Tony cried, especially over him, he had enough of that in his lifetime, he didn't need one more.

Seeing his husband in his current dishevelled and distressed state brought tears to Steve's eyes, that didn't stop him from trying to speak though, despite knowing that Tony was sleeping.

Steve was beginning to slip away, he was over-exerting himself, but it was worth it, anything was for Tony. "Tony, I'm sorry I couldn't... make it to your birthday... And I know... you love me, and I hope...  _you_ know that... I love you too. Always have... Always will."

Tony suddenly shifted in his sleep, he was having a nightmare, and Steve could tell. Tony whimpered, and a tear made its way down his cheek, before being swiped away by Steve's hand. Steve was exhausted, he wouldn't be able to make to for much longer, but he was thankful Tony was here, that's all he could really ask for.

Steve's consciousness was slipping. It was only a matter of time before it died, with him following suit.

"Don't cry, it'll be alright..."

And with that, the sounds of the heart monitor flatlining filled the room.

Well, having your husband die on you on your birthday may not be the best present one could receive, it sure is an unforgettable one.


End file.
